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I'm going to make a statement. And then I'm going to justify that statement. And then I'm going to add some qualifications to it so that you understand what I'm not saying as well as what I am saying. Statement Being offended is an intellectual weakness. Justification Here's a question: How do you feel about 2+2? Do you feel happy or sad? Do you feel bored? Patronised? Offended that I would ask you such a basic question? Do you feel 4? I'm betting that there are a number of possible answers to my question that I haven't listed but I'm fairly certain that no one feels 4. You can't solve a problem with feelings. No matter how offended or otherwise you are there is no way that the feeling you have is a solution to the problem. You do not feel 4. So, okay, someone says something or does something you don't agree with. The first question I think you have to ask is "what is the problem?" If there is no problem then you have no reason to be offended. If there is a problem then being offended will only cloud the issue. It seems to me that in some cases taking offence is a deliberate attempt to cloud a given issue, an attempt to defend an insecurity. In this circumstance the problem is you. Solve the problem. Qualifications This text could be interpreted as a set of fascist instructions. A formula for life that I would require people to follow every waking moment. Let me say that it is your right as a human being to be as offended as you want. Go ahead. I think society should accord the individual the right to freedom of expression. Some people might well assume that I would characterise women as more emotional than men. This is not the case. Firstly I don't believe in making generalisations at all and secondly even if I did my observation of humans leads me to the conclusion that men as a whole are no less emotional than women as a whole. I am not saying that an insecurity is an easy thing to get rid of but it's a hell of a lot easier to deal with if you know that it exists in you than if you go around denying it. |